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Choose a page number: 1 Entertainment Related ArticlesWGA seeks docu screenplay submissions - Film News: Deadline is Nov. 23, nominees announced Jan. 4 -- The Writers Guild of America has asked for submissions for its seventh annual documentary screenplay nod -- the only feature category in which the guild allows scripts not under WGA jurisdiction. ...Alpha and Omega - Film Reviews: Not without charm, Lionsgate's 3D animated pic is agreeably unambitious. ... Cohen launches with 'Law' - Film News: Film to open in November in the U.S. -- Cohen Media Group is launching as a distribution banner with Rachid Bouchareb's "Outside the Law" as its first release. ... Tabloid - Film Reviews: Proof that one must never underestimate another human's capacity to rationalize anything. ... Danielle Nicolet - TV News: Player ... Legendary - Film Reviews: It almost seems like 2010 marks the Year of the Loser. ... Myriad plays 'Nice' overseas - Film News: Shingle picks up int'l rights to Edward Burns pic -- As the Toronto Film Festival got under way Thursday, Myriad Pictures picked up all international rights to Edward Burns' romantic comedy "Nice Guy Johnny." ... Stone - Film Reviews: A pair of dead-on lead performances from Robert De Niro and Edward Norton. ... Former LFO member Cronin dies - Music News: His band was behind hit 'Summer Girls' -- Rich Cronin, who sang with the late-'90s boy band LFO, died Sept. 8 in Boston. He was 35 and had been suffering from leukemia. ... Brit helmer Clive Donner dies - Film News: New Wave director made 'What's New Pussycat?' -- TORONTO -- Clive Donner, the British helmer heralded for encapsulating the Swinging '60s of London in pics like "What's New Pussycat?" and "Here We Go Round the Mulberry Bush," died Sept. 7 in London. ... Screen Media takes pride in 'Lion' - Top News: Family adventure movie stars live lions -- Screen Media has pounced on Northern American rights to "White Lion," a family-friendly adventure pic helmed by Michael Swan. ... TWC flacks move to ID - Headline Newsletter Film News: Duo will continue to work on Weinstein films -- A pair of PR execs at the Weinstein Company are moving to entertainment praisery ID -- where they'll still work on campaigns for upcoming TWC releases. ... Synesthesia (Sinestesia) - Film Festival Reviews: Eric Burnasconi's debut feature "Synesthesia" is a well-handled if unremarkable drama that hooks viewer attention by being told in scrambled chronology and from several participants' points of view in detailing repercussions from a serious accident. The pic, set in Italian-speaking Switzerland, opened there this spring; star Alessio Boni should ensure theatrical exposure in Italy itself. Elsewhere, fest dates and tube sales beckon. ... Race to Nowhere - Film Reviews: Tyro helmer Vicki Abeles analyzes the ills of the educational system, with "Race to Nowhere." ... The Afterlight - Film Reviews: Four women cross paths during eclipse in Craig Macneill and Alexei Kaleina's "The Afterlight." ... The Sentiment of the Flesh (Le Sentiment de la chair) - Film Reviews: Fairly arresting feature debut for writer-helmer Roberto Garzelli. ... Fairfield Road - TV Reviews: A dead-end street as viewing experiences go. ... The 19th Wife - TV Reviews: Polygamy is fast becoming the dysfunctional family flavor of the month. ... Sundance shorts online - International News: Fest pairs with Gates, part of TEDxChange -- Sundance Institute is partnering with the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation for a series of shorts tied to world issues. ... Peru feels the 'Undertow' - International News: Fuentes-Leon's pic joins race for foreign Oscar nom -- Peru has chosen Javier Fuentes-Leon's "Contracorriente" (Undertow) to vie for a foreign language Oscar nomination. ... Pandora sees 'Futuro' in helmer - Film Festivals: Chile's Scherson moves ahead with adaptation -- Pandora Film has boarded "El futuro," director Alicia Scherson's adaptation of "Una novelita lumpen." ... Greco-Roman docudrama finds buyers - International News: Biarritz showcase boosts Gallic sales -- BIARRITZ, France -- "The Destiny of Rome" and "The Ascendance of Athens" a four-part docu-drama chronicling the epic adventures of Greek and Roman heroes has been pre-bought in key territories. Deals were announced at the TV France Intl. Rendez Vous in Biarritz, where the programs were showcased during a Roman-themed evening. ... 'Numbers' adds up for helmer - Film Festivals: Costanzo draws inspiration from diverse sources -- Young Italo helmer Saverio Costanzo referenced range of movies to make his ambitious genre-blender. ... FilmSharks swims abroad - International News: Argentina sales company opens beachheads in Asia and U.S. -- BUENOS AIRES -- FilmSharks Intl., an international film sales company out of Latin America, is opening foreign beachheads to snare bigger titles and sell more. ... Bollywood giant plans IPO - International News: Eros hopes to raise $75 million in India -- LONDON -- Bollywood giant Eros Intl. announced plans Thursday to raise 3.5 billion rupees ($75 million) on the Indian stock market. The company, which is listed on London's Alternate Investment Market, plans to raise the funds via an initial public offering through its wholly owned subsidiary Eros Intl. Media and has filed documents with the Registrar of Cos. in Mumbai. ... 'Ong Bak 3' attracts Magnet - Top News: Martial arts movie set for January release -- Magnet Releasing has picked up U.S. rights to "Ong Bak 3," the third installment in the martial arts saga toplined by Tony Jaa. ... Canada talks showbiz with India - International News: Co-production treaty to be signed in June -- LONDON -- The Canadian government has launched audiovisual co-production negotiations with India, James Moore, minister of Canadian heritage, announced Wednesday. This is expected to lead to a formal co-production agreement, likely to be signed during June's Intl. Indian Film Academy Awards in Toronto. ... Doc has designs on Ferretti - Indie News: Oscar winner's career examined -- Dante Ferretti is on the Lido today, taking time from London set of Martin Scorsese's 3D project. ... Venice plays big role in film history - Timothy M. Gray: Unique architecture, geography lures filmmakers -- It's clear that Venice has had a long love affair with film. ... 'Lope' marks Telefonica return - Film Festivals: Spanish telco mulls how to invest in other Iberian offerings -- Andrucha Waddington's "Lope," which screens out of competition Saturday, may mark a milestone for the Spanish film industry. ... The Last Circus (Balada triste de trompeta) - Film Reviews: Loud, tedious and unattractive in every sense. ... Black Venus (Venus Noire) - Film Reviews: The project is valiant, but writer-director Abdellatif Kechiche has trouble finding a rhythm. ... The Town - Film Reviews: Helmer/actor Ben Affleck delivers another potent slice of pulp set on Boston's meanest streets. ... Deathtrap - Legit Reviews: Being dated is absolutely not a problem for Matthew Warchus's smart revival of Ira Levin's 1978 hit. ... Dismissed (No olho da rua) - Film Reviews: Rogerio Correa makes a modest but effective feature writing-directing debut. ... Limbo - Film Reviews: Pic charts a Norwegian woman's emotional breakdown after she discovers her husband is unfaithful. ... Brother (Hermano) - Film Reviews: The road from slums to soccer glory intersects with crime in Marcel Rasquin's engaging debut. ... Nannerl, Mozart's Sister (Nannerl, la soeur de Mozart) - Film Reviews: Costumer about Mozart's older sister incorporates just enough fiction to bring history into focus. ... Apnea - Film Reviews: A competitive swimmer recalls his involvement with the girlfriend who's now gone missing. ... Lula: The Son of Brazil (Lula: O Filho do Brasil) - Film Reviews: Given the popularity of Brazilian President Luis Inacio Lula da Silva, aka "Lula," it was only a matter of time before a large-scale biopic of the leader's prole-to-power story was made. The fact that "Lula: Son of Brazil" was produced by the venerable LC Barreto unit, the country's deepest-pocketed filmmaking family, ensures a lavishly staged film (the $7 million pic is Brazil's priciest to date), even as its conventionally chronological narrative offers a much sanitized retelling. Solid local B.O. results in theaters and homevid has extended Lula's fame. ... World's Best Joke - When it comes for imagination, scientists can amaze people with the nature of experiments they do. Sometimes you may think that they have nothing better to do than amusing themselves and others, pushing the limits of the science. But most of the times, something good emerges from their experiments, and sometimes, they're only done just because it's always good to know, even though it's not always useful to your everyday life.... Zebra Crossings - When I say a thank you, i do not mean i expect the person to whip out a bunch of flowers or do a river dance like Michael Flattley across the road for my own enjoyment, (although this would be good, a moonwalk would be even better). Just the slightest nod of the head, 1, maybe 2 degrees would be nice. The slight raise of a finger would be nice, maybe an eyebrow. A thumbs up would be a bonus! With the exception of someone in a neck brace carrying two bags of heavy shopping with no eye brows, I think it should be made into a law that you must say thank you otherwise you will be sentenced to death. I commonly think, after such an event has occurred that maybe i should have not braked, turned my wheel slightly to the left and ploughed them into the nearest tree, but this would be murder and murder is illegal, and so it should be. ... What's So Funny? - If you are interested in avoiding psychosomatic illness and adding longevity to your life, read how to and scientific sources. Start now.... Hiring a Comedy Stage Magician, The Real Secrets - Honesty From a Dishonest Profession - With years of experience as an international comedy stage magician in Brisbane and England, I am going to tip you the real secrets of hiring a high quality magician for your event, and how to avoid the low quality magicians that could actually do more damage than good to your event. Simple Magicians jargon, the three main types of magicians that entertain your clients and guests in three very distinct ways.... Midlife Crisis Vs Weeds and a Lawn Mower - A covey of tenacious weeds had rooted themselves three inches in the dirt alongside to the house. Hell-bent on winning, I had declared war on these nutrient sucking bandits. At the same time LT ran speed trials with our young, extremely fit neighbor.... Booking a Comedian - Is It Best to Seek the Guidance Of A Comedy Booking Organization? - Booking a comedian would mean to tediously hunt for the right performer that could fit your company's event. However if you are seriously looking to make an impact with your staff, you might like to provide some thought to hiring a corporate comedian. Why would you wish to hire a comedian for your event?... Comedian For Hire - Guidelines on How to Pick the Best One For Virtually Every Event - A comedian for hire can definitely be the factor to the entertainment and amusement of those who are going to show up at your affair. However, it is not as simple as just deciding on a name then choosing the comedian.... Could Comedians For Hire Render Any Sort of Advantage To A Company? - Comedians for hire assist corporations encourage more laughter in the workplace. To hire a corporate comedian with regard to business meetings or group occasions could be advantageous in lots of ways.... Book Comedians For Your Company Events To Minimize Anxiety In Offices - Since most of us spend at least 40 hours a week on the workplace, you will need to develop fairly tranquil relationships with co-workers, supervisors and workers. Laughter aids move the focus away from anger, tension, guilt as well as other unfavorable emotions and increases a person's response to stressful conditions.... Police Watch Commander & My Midnight Ride - My midnight ride with the Watch Commander certainly zipped up my midlife agenda. To help the police department, LT worked an eight month stint as Watch Commander on Midnights.... You Have No Events Scheduled For Today - I own one of those "smart phones". This is good, because when it comes to electronics I am kind of dumb. One of the features of my phone is to send me an e-mail alert on any events that I have planned for that day. I never use it.... 3 Reasons You Need to Learn Good Money Quotes - Are you ever sitting with your friends and they start talking about money? Wouldn't it be great to offer some humor and say a cool money quote or two? With this short article, you will be able to accomplish just that!... Comedy Is More Than Funny One Line Jokes - One of the difficulties when discussing things which make us laugh is that almost everyone uses the words comedy, wit, buffoonery, humor and so on more or less indiscriminately including funny one line jokes. This does not matter much in conversation because it is usually clear what the speaker usually means, but is does matter in a book or article like this in which the words are technical terms.... Humor And Funny One Line Jokes - Humor and funny one line jokes only became socially acceptable, and therefore deemed worthy of consideration, about a hundred years ago. In the late nineteenth century, after a period beginning in the early 1,700's of nothing but boot faced rhetoric and grave demean-ours on all important occasions, a sense of humor became a social asset. And then virtually a necessity, it was also so much in use in upper social circles as an offensive weapon that Aristotle defined as 'educated insult'. Read more about this and our bonus package.... Can a Clean Comedian Turn Out to Be Entertaining After All? - A good solid clean comedian, often known as a family-favorable comic, is one that avoids offensive material in addition to profanity. One particular clean comedian is not hard to find, they're just not as readily accessible as more edgy comedians.... The Best Way to Book a Comedian Meant For Company Occasions - Want to book a comedian, but aren't sure where you should look? Do you feel anxious about booking the ideal comedian for your location as well as guest?... Improv Comedian - So What Does it Take to Possibly Be One? - An Improv comedian only has himself on an empty stage. Each and every idea he puts out arises from within him.... What is Improv Comedy? - Improve comedy is comedy made right before your very eyes. Absolutely no scripts, no memorized dialogue, no rehearsed scenes: solely wild ideas, a lot of energy, along with your ideas.... The Day Today - This Is The News! - The Day Today as with so many other British comedies produced precious few episodes, but the proportionate impact of those six episodes has been immense. Originally aired in early 1994 following the success of their radio prelude On The Hour, The Day Today covered the news, and by extension the news industry, with surreal accuracy. With Chris Morris providing an eerily accurate impression of Jeremy Paxman in a studio that bore a striking resemblance to ITN's News At Ten set of the time, one of the show's great strengths was the casual viewer could flick through and not realise ... I Really Hope You Never Meet a Washing Machine Engineer Like This! - My day usually begins at about 5.30 am, when I first start hitting the alarm clock. After about 3 hours of this, the alarm clock gives up and phones my wife, who knowing me quite well by now asks " I can see your eyes are open, but are you actually awake?" ... Freedom of Choice - Multi-Grain Or Moon Pies - Do you just feel better when you purchase something that says multi-grain? I shut down the part of my brain that knows to check the ingredient label to verify the first listed ingredient says the word: whole grain.... Writing Political Comedy - An Intro to Laughing at Your Politics and the American Political System - This is an introduction to writing political jokes. The article focuses on helping people find humor in their own politics before ripping the other side a new one. Creating laughter is a good way of bringing people together when there is a clear divide, just as in American Politics.... Know When to Walk Away - With all the ways we can communicate these days it's too easy to get stuck in a truly stupid conversation. This handy guide will show you how to avoid losing a few brain-cells by avoiding these talks all together.... I Joined a Dating Site the Other Day - The Questions They Asked Me Were Really Hard - I decided to join a Dating Site the other day. They sent me this questionnaire and asked me to complete and return it to them so they could find my ideal Match.... Value of a Good Clean Joke - Good clean joke is true humor, something funny, possibly hilarious in a tasteful way. A good joke may make fun in a kind silly way, around unusual situations, by blending the ridiculous with regular every day life creating humorous tales. Clean humor is just plain fun.... Top 5 Things That Can Drive You Crazy - When the finances are tight, the stress level rises like a thermometer left outside on a Summers day. Money has a way of magnifying your situation because most problems can be solved with a few more dollars. You're tired.... Angry Old Lady and Me - As I get older I've become more and more sensitive. And I have this reoccurring fear that I'm going to end up like the angry old cat lady who just stares and stares at people as they pass by and just when they think they've avoided contact with her, she yells, "My street!!! You're pounding on it!! Geeeet off!" ... Responsibility and the Fear of Cats - I learned about responsibility by being completely irresponsible. Early-twenties-summers-day-ago, I was feeling lonely and making money at the same time - a bad combination. On this particular summer day, I was feeling lonely and had money when I walked by PETCO. ... Where One Can Put There Funny Videos - Be Welcome to my video blog RelaxOn.tv and enjoy my collection of funny videos, funny pranks, funny commercials and also some of the interesting videos.... Sinkhole Gets Hungry - Tries to Swallow Restaurant - The Southeast Region is no stranger to Sinkholes. They have gobbled up cars, traffic signs, homes; whatever they need to survive. Usually, they are no major threat to humans and civilization, until now.... The Reason Why Men, Wine and Toaster Repairs Don't Always Go Together! - How not to Repair a Toaster after 2 glasses of wine. Plug in toaster. Punch lever several times.... Present Funny Quotes and Sayings at Concerts - I think one of the most hardest and very lucrative businesses you can get into is comedy because it pays well however it can be very difficult to get individuals to come see you perform. We are going to talk about ways you can attract more people to your concerts or parties so that they can see you perform some of your greatest hilarious quotes and sayings by using alternatives.... How Do Talented Comedians Use Funny Sayings & Quotes? - I have been to over 10 different comedian acts I must say that they talk and joke about some really interesting things that are simply outrageous to the ears of standard men. I have seen people literally barf all over there love ones because a joke was so funny presented by a comedian. This is the comedian job and it is what they do so I am not surprised at all when I see a professional get on stage and turn the house upside down with there hilarious jokes.... Top 7 Funny Computer T Shirts - What makes a computer t shirt funny? I think it's the ability to take a direct programmatic approach to humor. OK, actually, I actually think the unexpected is what is really the most funny.... Places to Share Your Funny Quotes & Sayings - One of the best things about having the ability to represent your own line of jokes is to present them in front of your friends. Believe it or not this kind of thing can enhance happiness in your life in the spotlight of those you enjoy being around.... Life Without Facebook - Social media was considered a waste of time in some schools of thought in the past but now its part of an image that one carries. You have to be on Facebook or you'll feel left out when your friends are discussing and you are looking at them like you're deaf and dumb.... Proposed Construction of International House of Pancakes Near Ground Zero Sparks Controversy - A meeting of the Lower Manhattan Community board became the scene of a heated debate today as hundreds people weighed in on whether it is appropriate to build an IHOP just blocks away from the site of the September 11, 2001 terror attacks on the city. Many feel that the presence of a restaurant know not only for it's outreach to foreign countries, including those in the Middle East from which the terror attacks originated, but also for its varied and reasonably priced breakfast menu is insensitive to the memory of those lost when the World Trade Center towers fell.... Methods For Creating Funny Quotes & Sayings - There are tons of ways to get a kick out of life by doing different things that you naturally already know. As human beings we already have those built in tools to make ourselves and others laugh hilariously. The question is what are some of those methods for you to use in order to uncover some of these right away.... Courier Jobs - The Funny Side - When you're in the middle of choosing, or working on courier jobs there are some situations you definitely want to avoid. How do old couriers pass on their years of accumulated wisdom to the younger generation of up-and-coming hotshots? Through legions of jokes and humorous stories about the perils of driving and courier jobs! We've picked out a few of our favourites to share.... Bright Idea - Time to Change the Ceiling Light - Any homeowner can change a lightbulb. But, what if the bulb is in the cathedral ceiling? Here is a light-hearted look at a challenging chore.... Computers Are Taking Over and It's Only a Matter of Weeks Until This Happens to You! - People call me all the time to ask me to repair their washing machine. The problem is, they assume because I'm on the 1st page of Google, I'm a real person. ... Performing Tips For Stand Up Comedians - As a stand up comedian, you should need to be different so that people will notice. Plus, in case you did say something out of turn, you are unsure how some participants in the crowd might interpret it. ... How Stand-Up Comedians Can Get Into TV Or Film - There are several stand-up comedians that have become successful and popular. Their achievement has led them to do television sitcoms based on their story. When you have an agent and start getting recognized, you can start really making a good reputation yourself.... Considerable Tips For Stand-Up Comedians - As a stand-up comedian, you simply will not constantly perform things right. Obviously, nobody's perfect either.... A Message From Your New Governor - That Speech in Full - Part Three - Plans to bring education, education, education to all the people of these islands are moving ahead quite smoothly. Once again, we have the cunning minds of the Temple of Dementia (sub-temple of Dumandumma) to thank for new, innovative education methods with which we hope to keep illiteracy levels rising on a healthy trend.... I Have a Couple of Days to Spare - I Know, Why Don't I Call My Cable Company? - Thank you for calling Vericon Broadband. In order to help you better we have some options for you. If you are able to hear this message, there is nothing wrong with your line, so please hang up now.... A Message From Your New Governor - That Speech in Full - Part One - As you know my predecessor, Gordonicus Laborius (a.k.a. "Gordonicus the terrible because he was, well, bloody terrible) has obligingly fallen on his sword and it has been my honour, along with my cohorts of the Coalitium Desperandum, to have been chosen by the Emperor for elevation to high office via the Festival of Dupus Electus. I have accordingly taken over the reins of power of this troubled Province.... The Life and Times of a Washing Machine Call Centre Operative - Working in a Washing Machine Repairs Call Centre has its funny moments. It's even better when you are clearly bored and you know you can't be sacked because nobody else will do it.... A Message From Your New Governor - That Speech in Full - Part Two - As you know, a great deal of heroic mendacity and manipulation, not to mention drugging, went into re-establishing the Empire along with a great deal of human sacrifice, which I am sure the sacrifices would have been only too pleased to make, had they been given a choice. It has been pointed out to me that, unfortunately, empires - or indeed human sacrifice - are difficult if not impossible gigs to pull off if you hang around waiting for permission because there is always the danger that you won't get it.... Hey Cartoonists - The Fans Need Closure! - What IS it about Cartoonists that when they decide to stop drawing a strip they REFUSE to give the fans Closure?? The creator of Cathy did this, and I didn't like it, did YOU??... Galvanized Bees - I hesitate to write this because it really lets the people who read this know how clueless I can be. That said, it also lets them know I'm capable of laughing at myself and have done so quite a bit since this happened. First, let me say that I really, really hate spiders and bees.... 10 Reasons Childhood Beats Adulthood - Movie marathon sleepovers ran up to the finish line - No one would dare close an eye until the last movie played and the popcorn was finished. Today if any adult makes it past the first movie without falling asleep, it is considered a fun-filled evening.... Priest Wins Fishing Tournament - Catches Holy Mackerel - Traverse City has become a hot destination spot during the summer. It's fame reaches wider than the National Cherry Festival and its plentiful wineries. It is also referred to as Michigan's Golf Coast, but the biggest attraction this Summer was on Lake Michigan Wednesday morning, as Father Earl Knickers caught a whopping 40 pound mackerel, breaking the old record set 3 years earlier.... Democrat Jokes - There are a lot of funny things that democrats do. Typically, the Republicans and other conservatives love to poke fun at (1) how much money the democrats spend, (2) the increase, in size, of the government, and (3) taking away freedom of choice.... Jean Paul Gaultier - "Codpieces Are Coming Back" - Jean Paul Gaultier, the famous designer who introduced man-skirts in the 80's and produced costumes for Madonna in the 90's, including her cone-shaped bra for the Blond Ambition Tour, is now setting his sights on a fashion for men, codpieces. A codpiece is a pouch that attaches to the front of men's trousers to accentuate the genitals.... I Have Rocks in My Yard - I have rocks in my yard. I suspect almost everyone, except for those absurdly fortunate folks who live in Florida, do. However, when I say rocks I don't mean, "Man, I had better move this before I hit it with my lawn mower and it breaks a window" type of rock. I mean, "Man, where's the tractor and do I have enough chain to wrap around these suckers?" types of rocks.... Local Ceiling Fan Caught Circulating Propaganda - On the ceiling of Phil's Fan Store on the corner of County Road J and County Road R, there is a fan that has been hanging around, maybe a little too long. Saturday afternoon, in the peaceful town of Menomonie, the Guzman family was browsing through Phil's, a family owned store since 1957. They were interested in purchasing a nice quiet fan that would give them no trouble, but trouble is exactly what they got.... Local Mime Behind Real Bars - For years, Bagenville's premiere mime, George "Get me out of this Box" Druthers has been badgering audiences with his act. You could always expect him to follow you through the Town Hall district doing the rope, the lean, eating imaginary hamburgers, and of course, his finale, trapped in a box.... NASA Study - Saggy Pants Problem Tied to Earth's Gravity - Wheatley, who has been working on the problem for the past 3 years, believes he has found a scientific explanation. At a press conference at NASA's headquarters this morning, Wheatley stated, "After hundreds of tests, I have found the cause for sagging pants.... Baby Buying Frenzy - The news of conception has barely been passed along when it happens. Through some inexplicable method of communication the word goes out to all female relatives of the child to be. "LET THE BUYING BEGIN!" And boy does it ever begin.... How to Find Open Mics - As a budding stand-up comedian, you might start out by having resistance from local comedy clubs in your place. In the interim, you have to give open mics a try. By no means that should you give up trying for the clubs, but in the meantime, open mics would probably give you a platform you will not normally get.... Performing Tips - Listed here are more ideas as well as pointers you can do in order to get yourself on the road to being a competent stand up comedian: Make videos of your shows. You need to be able to get back and look at the way it turned out. There could be some things that you did not like and might have to have adjustments.... Surrealistic Pillow - What exactly do we mean by 'surreal'? Because if we mean, as I think we do, what is unreal, imaginary, impossible and higher than life, then let me tell you something, there isn't such thing. Life has shown me that there is nothing that you shouldn't expect.... Carpenters and Computers - Computer people are a special lot. We tend to take things literally and have little side to side vision when it comes to a problem we have.... Have a FIT and Get Well - Psychiatry's Miracle Breakthrough! - Detractors of course are fond of pointing to the millions of deaths and mental breakdowns of people in psychiatric care but such hysterical aspersions are easy to dismiss as those deaths can be statistically proven to be of people who would have died eventually anyway. Besides, critics of psychiatry have been found - for irrefutable evidence, see the minutes of our last national conference - to be suffering from COP (Criticizing of Psychiatry Disorder) or Prooforexia (an obsession with introducing science into mental health).... Mental Health Fraud - Psychiatrists Now Claim They Were Bonkers When They Invented Mental Illness - Defense lawyers representing 10,000 psychiatrists standing trial for the largest mental health fraud in history now claim their clients were suffering from a hitherto undiagnosed mental illness (Psychobabblorexia) when they accidentally fabricated 300 fake mental illnesses and made everyone think they were proper doctors. Graduating from numerous psychiatric schools such as the Otto Von Bismarck Institute of Brain Hygiene and the Drug-U-Like Emporium, the accused soon established themselves as experts on writing prescriptions, killing celebrities, the eradication of parenting and education and convincing people they are mentally ill. ... Beginning Guidelines For Stand Up Comedians - Stand-up comedy is a different variety of comedy. There is generally a live audience and the comedian (stand-up comic) will speak with them directly. They normally use a microphone and stand up the whole or at least for the majority of the show.... How to Establish a Style of Comedy - Though their road to popularity may be challenging in the beginning, once they start getting a captive and responsive audience, they are on their way to their reward. Starting out, they should use their brain and look at what will make the audience laugh.... The Way to Polish Your Stand Up Comedian Routine - Many people love to hear you tell jokes. Your family and friends exclaim about how much you could get people to laugh. They might seem to consider that stand-up comedy can be your true calling. At this point you need to learn how funny you are as well as what you can accomplish in order to take advantage of this particular gift.... Foot Dr Cures Foot Odor By Chopping Them Off - Renowned Foot Surgeon, Town Butcher and best-selling author of This Little Piggy Went to The Market, Agreesh Patel, stunned the medical community with his latest medical breakthrough on how to cure stinky feet. In an exclusive interview with Dr. Patel, he tells of how he came to realize this procedure.... Teen Charged With Murder For Burning Insects - Summer days are supposed to be play time for kids, off from school, and carousing about. Some attend day camp, others in the neighborhood pool, or on the street playing Double Dutch. But for one area teen, there will be no duck duck goose in his near future. Ryan Folly, 14 was arraigned this morning in the Union County Courthouse. He was charged with 3 counts of first degree murder for the deaths of 2 ants and 1 Japanese beetle.... Funny Motivational Posters - Are They Demotivators? - Yes, they may sometimes be irritating and hurt people's sentiments. They may obviously not motivate them, but they often entertain them and this makes them always in demand as long as we the people need the longest laugh on our face. ... Humor in Traffic Exchanges - If you are desperate to show your site or blog to a lot of visitors without risking payments then you stand to be thoroughly humored notwithstanding the hard stats involved in this business. There is no dearth of free traffic exchanges. You register for one and hundreds come up cozy for you.... Wal-Mart Shopping and Senior Moments - There are lots of reasons for forgetfulness that don't include being a "senior." There's the woman sitting at the wrong gate when her plane took off who then reported her car stolen after she searched in a different parking lot from where she actually parked. She wasn't a senior, she was pregnant.... Teaching My Wife To Drive - There are many funny jokes floating around about women and their driving abilities. It's a guy thing I guess. But is there any truth to assertions women are inferior to men when it comes to operating a vehicle?... Balloon Regrets Fleeing Little Girl's Hand - It was a fun day at the Kings Island Amusement Park for little Marina Collins and her family. She had ridden the Tea Cups, taken a train ride on the K.I. & Miami Railroad, and a fun splash down ride in White Water Canyon.... Become a Comedian - Discover the Fastest and Easiest Way to Get on Stage Today! - We all have many talents that we can use to make our lives better and to make money. Some of us are athletic, some are incredibly intelligent. Others are funny and belong on a stage entertaining the world with their jokes. ... How to Impress New Friends - A brief how-to, self help guide on how to make friends, impress acquaintances and influence people. All you need to know in just a few steps on how to be the life of the party!... Life, Death and Carmen's Avena - When I was small there were a few things that made breakfast worth getting up for. First, was my mother Carmen's oversized Aunt Jemima pancakes; these were so big that when rolled-up, they could be used for batting practice. Second, was Carmen's Puerto Rican oatmeal (Avena); it was like eating hot ice cream.... Funny Top Ten Lists - What's More Fun Than a Facelift? - There's nothing quite like one of our funny top ten lists to gently inform you that it's time for major cosmetic surgery. That is, if you ever plan to show your droopy face in public again.... The Cure For Middle Lane Moron Syndrome? - What is MLMS? Middle lane Moron Syndrome is not exclusively for the middle lane drivers but is where a driver feels that when driving on a road with more than one lane it is acceptable for them to use a lane other than the left hand lane (when driving in the UK) to sit in when they are not overtaking another vehicle. Contrary to some arguments from people who fear they are wrongly diagnosed with MLMS it is irrelevant of the speed travelled, the time of day, the size of your car, the fact you are driving a car or ... Dear Brother Twitter - But I must urge you to consider this. Don't follow people. It is not an activity a decent person like you should indulge in.... Dentists Are Scary - Many people tend to be scared of visiting the dentists for the wrong reasons. Some people worry about the tests finding cavities. Others worry about root canals, or any other types of painful procedures. Me - I don't care about tooth pain. I am afraid of the dentists themselves.... 10 Things Science Can't Achieve - Compensate for lack of touch. Cell phones and social network are all very well, but no amount of technological advancement can replace the magic of a warm hug.... Lorenzo Von Matterhorn - Lorenzo von Matterhorn is surprisingly enough very popular on the internet even though considering the fact that he is just a fictional character, introduced by the character Barney Stinson - real name Neil Patrick Harris - in one of the CBS sitcoms 'How I Met Your Mother'. The character of Lorenzo von Matterhorn is said to be born in Switzerland in the year 1974. Soon after his birth, he was put into a basket and thrown into a river.... Travails of a Middleclass Consumer - Humour - My wife wanted to buy a Washing Machine, during the summer since our children were expected from the states, along with their kids for vacation. As usual, I was given the task of searching for the most economical, efficient and durable machine in the market. I set out looking for the machine in the Internet, carefully sifting the mass of information dumped on me, and shortlisted five items, which were very High Tech and Latest models with funny sounding names. ... Practical Joke Bumper Stickers - The Art of Pranking a Car! - Learn the joys of using hilarious 'fake' joke bumper stickers to prank a friend's car. This is currently a popular gag, even among celebrities, but the idea is not new; the author has decades of experience in this form of humor.... The Telephone Conversation - Selling an old car is never easy. A classified advertisement attracted the attention of a Brit who really couldn't speak English.... Al Jaffee is a Living Cartooning Legend - At the age of 89 Al Jaffee is still making a huge impact on the world of cartooning. His biggest impact is the the infamous Fold-ins on the back cover of Mad Magazine; Mr. Jaffee invented the gag in 1964 and since then has produced over 450 of the hilarious visual double-entendres. Equally skilled as a sharp-witted satirist, he is one of the main contributors to Mad's Snappy Answers to Stupid Questions.... Women Are Very Hard to Please - A group of girls are on vacation in the Bahamas when they come across a 5 story hotel. The hotel has a large sign on it that says "For Women Only". They figure since their husbands and boyfriends aren't with them this would be a perfect place to stay at.... Having a Really Bad Day - There is a guy sitting at the bar that is just staring into his drink. This guy has been there for almost the entire day and hasn't moved. Suddenly a known trouble making carpenter walks into the bar.... Tweezers Are a Must in Vehicles - Following one of my first posts on my blog, my best friend shared an experience sure to resonate with many readers. D owns a successful embroidery business.... The Ambulance - Who is Driving? - LT refuses to ride with me unless he is recovering from anesthesia. In our twenty years together he has been my passenger six times.... What Do You Do? - Repeatedly, since I retired ten years ago (at 42), I have been asked "What do you do?" Over, over and over again, I have been asked.... The 1970s - Let's Go Back - Recognize hot pants and the white go-go boots? Sorry, you just dated yourself! Not to worry, I am sure you love your appointed role as baby boomer in our society.... Let's "Do Lunch" - Mommy and I decided to go out for a nice mother-daughter lunch after an exhausting trawl around an HUGE food warehouse store. I mean who REALLY uses a gallon size jar of Vienna sausages, yet we go up and down the aisles looking for that once in a lifetime bargain.... Five Things You Can Only Do If You're a Ghost - Death and taxes, they happen to everyone, and while taxes happen on a daily basis, death usually happens but once. So I say, if you have to go, then why not enjoy the trip. Not in some morbid zombie like way, and I'm not suggesting an Edward the vampire living-death kind of thing either.... Dressing For A Heist - This article provides a few suggestions for a man considering dressing like a woman to commit a crime. I suggest you put on your woman attire and visit a local bar, preferably one that plays a lot of country music. If you get hit on before midnight by more than one patron, consider yourself ready. Any amorous attention after midnight doesn't count. It seems everyone gets prettier at closing time.... Becoming a Better Man - The next article I perused was, "How To Get Ketchup Out Of A Bottle." I'm not kidding. Clearly this is one of the great challenges of mankind and a requirement for being a better man. A humorous look at what someone thinks are the qualities needed to become a better man.... The Blonde on Who Wants to Be a Millionaire - Regis Philbin - "Heather, you've made it to the final round and have one lifeline left, which is the phone a friend lifeline." "Answer the next question correctly and you'll win the one million dollar top prize, however if you answer it incorrectly you'll drop down to $32,00..... Copyright © 2010, Waddies.com. All Rights Reserved. |
